fashionwhore

I love free stuff

2004-08-27T15:50:00.000-07:00

So today on my lunch break I decide to walk up to the GAP...I know they are having this promo where, if you try on jeans, you get to pick from a stack of lottery coupons deals...and like every 1 in 10,000 is for a free pair of pants. But, the most common coupon is for a measly $10 off...Fine. I try on their new Ultra Low Rise jeans, the ones featured in the new ads with Sarah Jessica Parker. Wow, they are fantastic. And they come in a long enough inseam to actually fit my oddly long legs.

Alright - I decide, I can spring for the $58.00 and hope for a $10 off coupon. The register girl, who usually annoys the crap out of me because she is a very "hands on" salesperson...anyways, she asks if I got a coupon. I say no. So she goes in the back and retrieves a stack of these cards. She fans them out and I reach for one, then decide to take the one right below it. I peel it open and lo and behold - it says in all caps "WINNER!!!".

I almost fell over. I mean, I am the girl who never gets anything for free. I always get screwed. So I just smile at the girl and say "oh my god, I won free jeans!" and she didnt believe me and so I handed her the coupon and she just jumped up and down, because, as I said earlier, she is very hands on...so she feels like she helped me in winning these jeans...whatever.

All I know is I got a pair of killer $58.00 jeans for nothing...and I am damn happy. I will wear these jeans forever and always remember that they were free free free...

I need to go play the lottery today.

Long live the GAP!

Meetings are the biggest waste of time ever

2004-08-25T13:04:00.000-07:00

So I just realized that I have to sit in meetings for the next 4 fucking hours. Ugh. One is only a half hour long (phew) but the other is literally 3.5 hours of crappy computer training.

I know, I am new at this job. I have only been here 3 weeks and I have alot to learn, but my INBOX is literally filled to the rim and I cannot imagine wasting this much time on this crap. BUDGET TRAINING for 3.5 hours!

Come on people, I am an HR assistant. I am not doing the budget.

What a waste of time. This is why no work ever gets done in this world!!!

Tuesday and my patience is already short

2004-08-24T05:55:00.000-07:00

Ok - it is only 8:53am and I feel my patience waning...this morning involved another parking/commuting debacle.

See, there are these crazy rules in DC that say that if you have out of state plates you cannot park on a DC street for more than 2 hours. And the fuckers in the DPW actually walk around and input plate numbers all day into their little handheld dealy...and if your plate comes up as being in that ZONE at all during the 24 hour period you get a $30 ticket. After getting two fucking tickets in a matter of a week I have decided to try to beat the system.

So I found this one neighborhood that has two streets full of UNZONED parking, which means there arent those friggin green signs...the whole street is filled with out of staters like me who are sick and tired of paying tickets...

The only catch is that one side of the street has street cleaning on Monday and the other side has street cleaning on Tuesday, which means that there are half as many spots in those times.

So your options are as follows if you are stuck like me -- race home at lunch or right after work on Monday to move your car to the side of the street that has spots for Tuesday, or drive to work. Ick. Generally I get there early enough to beat all the other suckers out to a spot...but last night, nope. I got screwed. I got there at 5:50 pm and there were no spots. I drove around the block for an hour, in vain, hoping someone, anyone, would leave. Nope. So I had to drive my car back to my neighborhood, about 8 blocks south. Parked on my street and decided to check again at 10:00pm. No spots. Fine. I decided I would retry at 7:00am.

So I set my alarm for 7:00am. Wake up one hour early and drag myself outside. Drive up to Guam. No spots. Drive around 3 times and cant find a spot. So I give up and drive to work - in Downtown DC. Nice. If any of you have had the pleasure of driving in DC in rush hour you know the glee that I felt as I got stuck at red light after red light, watching zillions of pedestrians flood the crosswalks each and every time I attempted to take a right turn.

God I love those extra slow pedestrians - they make me smile. Smile as I debate about whether jail time for gently tapping them would be worth the happiness I would surely feel...as I bump them with my bumper to encourage them to walk a little slower. I mean, I know they HAVE to make that phone call at 7:45am, and they simply MUST juggle their extra grande soy latte and muffin from Starbuckkkks and they also MUST carry along not only a briefcase but a gym bag...so of course, they have to walk about 3 times as slow as the normal crippled human being because they simply cant be expected to move quickly at all...what is wrong with me, expecting people to be conscientious of others...especially us other commuters stuck on the corner...HURRY THE FUCK UP LOSER!

Ok - onto my other rant for the day. Men. Specifically one man, who I have been seeing on and off for about 2 months. He is 21. Young. Very young. Still in college. But hot as all fuck.

Basically we get along in all almost all of the important ways - same religion, same crazy ass family, amazing sex, blah blah blah. But his schedule - it is fucking ridiculous. And he still is young and loves the bars. And getting drunk. And his "boys". He doesnt get that when I offer to make him dinner it is a big fucking deal, because I dont cook for anyone other than myself, and that generally only involves a sandwich or pasta...me offering more than that is a sure sign that I actually LIKE him for than the average schmuck...

He also doesnt get how fucking important it is to spend the god damn night with me. He has this habit of leaving at like 3:00am, after a fantastic night of cuddling, sex and movies (not in that order, generally)...because he has to WORK OUT WITH HIS BROTHER AT 5:30AM!!!! I have stressed how leaving me to go work out with his brother is a little fucking loserish. But whatever, he does have a slamming body, so I guess we make sacrifices. But come on buddy - I am hot, I am naked, we are both spent -- spend the fucking night and get some am nookie. Dont just up and leave.

And finally, he is horrible at making god damn plans. The kid has to wait till the last possible second for his plans to come through...and even then he cant really commit to me.

Now I know what you are thinking - that he just isnt that into me. But that isnt it -- he calls like 5 times a day, texts me all the time, whatever....he is just young. Immature. He has had girlfriends for long stretches of time, but at 21 how much experience can he really have? I mean I am like 6 years older and I feel like a relationship idiot...so he cant be much better.

We are on a "break" now, a la Friends...I hate this shit...this dance of dating. I wish there could just be set rules an we all follow them and thats it. Instead we have to do this dance and play games and what not. I hate this fucking shit.

I am going celibate.

Ugh - can today be a redo?

2004-08-23T06:59:00.000-07:00

So today has been one of those where I wish I could just crawl back under my covers and do a "do-over"...

First of all, I could barely sleep more than an hour at a time because my AC was acting up...so every few minutes I would wake up shivering, and go shut the AC off...then a few minutes later I would wake up sweltering and nauseated and turn the AC back on...this cycle went on for what seemed like hours...

Ok - so I woke up at 7:00 - a full 30 minutes early so that I could go into work to get some stuff done that I forgot to do before leaving my job early on Friday.

Sure enough, something happened to derail this...I am all ready to go, proud of myself at 7:30am...I pack my purse for work (snacks, balance bars, makeup, wallet...check all)...then I realize - I left my work ID in my car! My car that is parked 8 blocks north, all up hill, in the exact opposite direction fo my office! And due to the new code orange restrictions in DC here I HAVE to have my ID to get into my office. Because even though our security guard KNOWS me he wont let me get in without this stupid flimsy picture ID.

I realize what I have to do --> I have to HIKE up to my car in my new heels at 7:30am to get this friggin ID. I hold out hope as I board the elevator that maybe the bus will come and that I will be saved the misery of speedwalking in my new heels, which are sure to shred my sensitive heels to a bleeding mess...but no, no bus in sight. So I start hauling ass, still holding out hope that maybe a bus will come when I am on my way. Nope. Never happens.

So I get to my car at about 7:50, heels officially bleeding, the skin on my poor feet rubbed raw. I retrieve my keys (thank god they are there)...and cross the street and walk 2 blocks south to wait for the bus...

Get on the bus and am stuck taking the first seat behind the driver. Which means I cant see out the window = motion sickness for me. Ugh. So we get two stops and this woman who works at my old lunch haunt near my old job gets on with her 10 year old son. I hold out hope that she wont recognize me, but no, she does. And she stands behind me, so I have to turn around to talk to her, thereby increasing my lovely motion sickness. Because as most of us know, the two main causes for motion sickness are not being able to see out the front window and facing backwards. Yummy.

Ok - so I am two stops away from my bus stop. And what happens - the police have closed the road so that a 6 story high crane can back into a construction site. Traffic is stopped for 10+minutes. And our bus driver, by law, cannot let us out unless we are at an actual stop. So we are held hostage.

Finally I get to my stop and race to my office to get the work that I forgot to do on Friday done by my 9:00 meeting. I get into work only to realize that some of the documents that need to be coallated are not fully copied.

Ok - race across the bldg, grab a soda and start a-copying. The copier jams (of course!)...finally after 4 jams and 4 repairs I get the damn copies done. Race back to my desk. Coallate like crazy.

I think I am home free and it is only 8:40am. Yay. 20 minutes to spare.

Realize that I have to take a picture of our new hire using the Polaroid. I search for the camera only to realize that I left it in Ritz Camera downstairs on Thursday! Crap. Grab my keys, smile at my boss as she gets in and literally run downstairs praying that the camera did not run off...phew --- they have it behind the counter. The film developer guy looks at my like I am a complete idiot and hands me the camera and wont even make eye contact as I try to somehow explain my total lack of intelligence. Whatever, fuck him, he gets paid $6.75 to develop film, ok???

Now it is 10:30am. The packets have been completed. The pictures have been taken. I am ready to drink my soda (finally) and eat my bagel. Thank god.

Only 13 hours and 30 minutes till this cursed day is over.

Only Only 8 more days left....

2004-06-16T05:50:00.000-07:00

till I get to leave this miserable job at a non-profit in DC. I have finally gotten myself a kick ass job in the private sector working at a fabulous dot com. Thank god...because this job was literally sucking the life out of me...ever since I started working here about 3 months ago I have found myself slowly spiraling down into a deeper depression...this job just isnt what I thought it would be and I have been angry at myself for a while for taking this job, when in my gut I knew it wasnt the place for me...

Sadly, though, I like most, ok, some, of the people here...We have such an interesting mix of staff --- people from all walks of life and all sorts of educational backgrounds...but where I fit in, I have no idea. I was sort of the freak in the office - from the area, local university, attractive, lots of work in the private sector, no real desire to change the world...sort of just earning my next paycheck to work my way up in the world and start accumulating more crap and paying down my current debt...

So I quit yesterday. By far, one of the best moments of my life. I had just accepted this new position...making a lot more money then at this non-profit, and in my glee I found myself unable to stop smiling as I handed in my lovely resignation letter. The even better part was when I got to explain why I was quitting, since it was a fun little combo of not being able to work with the a certain micro-manager in my office as well as the lack of real work for me to do here...but it was great to actually attribute my departure to someone I dislike so much. I am awful!!!

My first day in blogging...

2004-06-16T05:47:00.000-07:00

So today is my first day trying this blogging thing out...I have tons of journals floating around my little 325 SF apt, but find that most of my thoughts and journal-writing urges come to me while at work....so I figured blogging would be a good and healthy outlet for me!!!